A Lesson from the Lobster

Self-Study. 

The Court Lobster. 

Finding More and More Good Days. 

This was a worthwhile pursuit. The season of life when I took a deep dive into self-study. The time I invested in trying to better understand myself and my personality. There are so many good options and opportunities for self-study, but my enneagram journey has given me the most insight and joy. It’s an ancient tool that is still relevant today. This self-study tool is like having a microscope to help me see myself more deeply and a telescope to see how I can better fit in to the grand picture of life. I have a much better sense of what makes me uniquely me and a better feeling of how to connect to others on a deeper, more meaningful level. The Myers-Briggs is another personality typing tool with similar tools. One thing I love is that these tools don’t necessarily try to change people. The purpose seems to be self-awareness. Then, we can use this self-awareness to better self-actualize, serve our community and world more effectively, and to act like a courageous lobster. 

In Elizabeth Gilbert’s book, Big Magic, she tells the story of a young artist who was invited to a costume party by some friends. In an innocent oversight, they neglected to tell him it was a themed costume party. The theme was a medieval court. The young artist was dressed as a giant, red lobster. I laugh just thinking about the moment he arrives, that moment he and his fellow party guests first see each other. Oh, the shock they ALL must have felt, for very different reasons, from their very different perspectives. But the beauty of this experience is how this young man responded. He entered the party, head held high, greeting the fellow guests as though this was to be expected of him. This was his role and he fully embraced it. When asked about the costume, he replied, “I’m the Court Lobster.” Elizabeth tells of the evening that was transformed and energized when he chose to hold his head high and take advantage of this opportunity, responding to this potentially horrific experience for this courageous lobster.  

I made a note. “I’m finding more and more good days.” This is how my journal began last November 25. Even when there were struggles and frustrations, I found myself coming to the close of the day feeling good about it. There is a “having a bad day” mindset that sets a toxic tone. I can’t remember the source, but I remember reading that we have a choice. When things fall apart, we can choose to have bad days or bad moments. More and more, I’ve chosen to have bad moments. Yes, we can choose to turn around the next day, but how powerful to recognize that we can turn things around the next moment. Not that things will be necessarily better or good, but we can make a choice to respond in serenity with the things we cannot control. We can choose to respond with courage when we can. We can pause, breathe, and have the wisdom to recognize when we can and when we cannot. This “having a bad moment” mindset is far healthier as we seek more and more good days. As we become more self-aware, and as we learn to live with the courage and wisdom of a court lobster.